Free Beer . . .

All
Some of you may remember my blog a few weeks back where I was forced (by myself) to go to a Leeds pub to take part in a free whisky tasting session – all so I could write a thrilling (though incoherent the day after) piece about it on this website.
Well imagine my horror this week when I found myself in that exact same pub… for an evening of free beer tasting… and again just so I could keep you, dear reader, enlightened as to what goes on in this wonderful metropolis called Leeds.
I obviously tried to get out of attending. My following conversation with Phil (Culture Vulture’s temporary editorish) clearly demonstrates my reluctance for more free booze:
Me: Phil, do you really want me to do a piece on this?
Phil: Yes, thank you for volunteering.
Me: Well, if it’s in the name of art….
Oh the humanity…
So down I popped again to Mr Foley’s in the Headrow for a ‘Meet the Brewer’ night with Summer Wine Brewery who are based in Huddersfield. Managing Director Andy and Brewer James explained to a decent sized crowd (why do the words ‘free’ and ‘alcohol’ always attract large numbers?) that although they only started two years ago, they have plans for world domination. And the way to do that? Get people pissed. On beer. If only James Bond villains had realised it was this simple.  Not content with now being a nationwide brewery, by 2012 James and Andy fully intend to be a major Yorkshire player in the world export market. While stroking white Persian cats. And laughing maniacally. To say they only use six barrels at the moment, and they’re soon to expand to 20, I’d say watch this space.
Anyway, brief history lesson out of the way, we got down to business: the drinking. First up was Tiberius, a light beer, a pale ale. Apparently this is a ‘session beer’, very English, made with Anglo/American hops. I enjoyed my first sip/gulp. But I soon felt it had a strange aftertaste, as did others on my table. I wouldn’t want to have a session on this stuff – it was just a little too light for my liking.
This was followed by Portcullis at 5%. A darker, extra special beer, described by Andy and James as “best bitter on heat”! This one had a reddish hue to it, spicy, brewed using Kentish hops: “a true taste of Kent – in a glass”. The resident non-beer drinking expert on our table described it as such:  “it tastes colourful”. And I can’t really argue with her.
Next up was Project 6 Brew 5 at 6%. Again, the experts on my table had the following wise words on it: “tastes more like a beer – except we’re tasting it in a whisky glass”; and “better than the first one”. Please tell me you’re not reading this article for acquiring beer knowledge…
Basically this is a project they’re working on over time, with Brew 6 – coming soon, to a cinema near you – just around the corner. In the meantime, they handed round strange label-less brown bottles, which we were told were Brew 2 and Brew 3.
Now, Brew 2?! Mama! Boy, did this one have a kick. This isn’t a beer for drinking. It’s a beer for lying down and avoiding. I loved it. Others on the table were also most appreciative. “It’s a cheeky little bastard that slaps you round the face” was one such eloquent observation.
Brew 3 tasted like fizzy lager. Wasn’t impressed. Wanted more Brew 2 god damn it!
I’d been looking forward to the last beer all night, ever since they’d mentioned it at the beginning of the evening. I don’t remember its name, but it was a treacle stout at 4.8%. Apparently 21 tonnes of treacle go into making it. And that’s just into one pint. So you can imagine how pleased I was when I nipped outside for five minutes to come back – and find everyone had drunk it. An important lesion was learnt there. Never – ever – leave a free beer tasting session. If you have to go, cross your legs.
An enjoyable night, and I can’t sign off without mentioning the fantastic spread of free food that was laid on for us. I know – free beer! Free food! All that was missing were complimentary tickets to the lap dancing club next door. May be you could consider this for next time guys? Just a suggestion….
Being a lightweight with alcohol of any sort, the brown booze had its desired effect  – and made me walk over to the bar. To buy some more…

Faces

David Maguire writes another guest post, this time it’s about beer tasting . . . I’m sensing a pattern forming  . . .

Some of you may remember my blog a few weeks back where I was forced (by myself) to go to a Leeds pub to take part in a free whisky tasting session – all so I could write a thrilling (though incoherent the day after) piece about it on this website.

Well imagine my horror last week when I found myself in that exact same pub… for an evening of free beer tasting… and again just so I could keep you, dear reader, enlightened as to what goes on in this wonderful metropolis called Leeds.

I obviously tried to get out of attending. My following conversation with Phil – Culture Vulture’s temporary editor(ish) – clearly demonstrates my reluctance for more free booze:

Me: Phil, do you really want me to do a piece on this?

Phil: Yes, thank you for volunteering.

Me: Well, if it’s in the name of art….

Oh the humanity…

So down I popped again to Mr Foley’s in the Headrow for a ‘Meet the Brewer’ night with Summer Wine Brewery who are based in Huddersfield. Managing Director Andy and Brewer James explained to a decent sized crowd (why do the words ‘free’ and ‘alcohol’ always attract large numbers?) that although they only started two years ago, they have plans for world domination. And the way to do that? Get people pissed. On beer. If only James Bond villains had realised it was this simple.  Not content with now being a nationwide brewery, by 2012 James and Andy fully intend to be a major Yorkshire player in the world export market. While stroking white Persian cats. And laughing maniacally. To say they only use six barrels at the moment, and they’re soon to expand to 20, I’d say watch this space.

Anyway, brief history lesson out of the way, we got down to business: the drinking. First up was Tiberius, a light beer, a pale ale. Apparently this is a ‘session beer’, very English, made with Anglo/American hops. I enjoyed my first sip/gulp. But I soon felt it had a strange aftertaste, as did others on my table. I wouldn’t want to have a session on this stuff – it was just a little too light for my liking.

This was followed by Portcullis at 5%. A darker, extra special beer, described by Andy and James as “best bitter on heat”! This one had a reddish hue to it, spicy, brewed using Kentish hops: “a true taste of Kent – in a glass”. The resident non-beer drinking expert on our table described it as such:  “it tastes colourful”. And I can’t really argue with her.

Next up was Project 6 Brew 5 at 6%. Again, the experts on my table had the following wise words on it: “tastes more like a beer – except we’re tasting it in a whisky glass”; and “better than the first one”. Please tell me you’re not reading this article for acquiring beer knowledge…

Basically this is a project they’re working on over time, with Brew 6 – coming soon, to a cinema near you – just around the corner. In the meantime, they handed round strange label-less brown bottles, which we were told were Brew 2 and Brew 3.

Now, Brew 2?! Mama! Boy, did this one have a kick. This isn’t a beer for drinking. It’s a beer for lying down and avoiding. I loved it. Others on the table were also most appreciative. “It’s a cheeky little bastard that slaps you round the face” was one such eloquent observation.

Brew 3 tasted like fizzy lager. Wasn’t impressed. Wanted more Brew 2 god damn it!

I’d been looking forward to the last beer all night, ever since they’d mentioned it at the beginning of the evening. I don’t remember its name, but it was a treacle stout at 4.8%. Apparently 21 tonnes of treacle go into making it. And that’s just into one pint. So you can imagine how pleased I was when I nipped outside for five minutes to come back – and find everyone had drunk it. An important lesion was learnt there. Never – ever – leave a free beer tasting session. If you have to go, cross your legs.

An enjoyable night, and I can’t sign off without mentioning the fantastic spread of free food that was laid on for us. I know – free beer! Free food! All that was missing were complimentary tickets to the lap dancing club next door. May be you could consider this for next time guys? Just a suggestion….

Being a lightweight with alcohol of any sort, the brown booze had its desired effect  – and made me walk over to the bar. To buy some more…

One comment

Comments are closed.