People come up to me all the time in the street and ask, “Phil, what exactly goes on at a Culture Vultures editors meeting?”
Actually, not just in the street. Recently I’ve been accosted in a lift on my way to deliver some bad news and a pizza to a friend, in the organic veg aisle at Morrisons as I lingered over the baby spinach, in Greggs as I was just about to order a claggy looking cheese and onion pasty, even in the shower as I was . . . erm . . . hell, the door was shut, it was meant to be a private moment! Anyhow, whoever the questioner and whatever the circumstances my answer is always the same; “I have no idea,” I say, “ask someone who was sober!”
This significantly reduces the odds of ever finding out. Frequently to zero.
Editors meetings are in fact a recent institution. For most of the existence of Culture Vultures we just met in the pub, got gradually drunk, made grandiose plans, and then spent the following month wondering what the hell we were meant to be doing. This new more formal dispensation was embarked upon to make the process more open, transparent and responsible. Meetings are now held around a table in an office in Munro House. We have an agenda. Someone takes minutes. Everything is written down and circulated and signed off. Nowadays we all know precisely what decisions we are dodging and which promises we are doing bugger all about.
I long to bring back the days of oblivion.
One recent innovation I heartily approve of is the introduction of food into the proceedings. So far we have had offerings from Create, @MrPeshwari, and last time from Lahore Cafe Bar and pretty damned good it was too. I’m hoping this shameless plug will encourage more fine dining establishments to bestow the best of their menus upon us poor but honest (eminently bribable) local culture bloggers . . . there’s about twelve of us, half veggies . . . is that a heavy enough hint?
While I’m in a venal mood, how about some alcohol too? Last time we had a bottle of Grey Goose Orange vodka donated and must say it was mightily appreciated. I personally appreciated it mightily several times. My repeated appreciation of the vodka is possibly the main reason the memory of the last editorial meeting is not much more than a tangy, orange tinted haze – would that all my evenings passed so pleasantly!
All I vaguely remember was a conversation about drafting a style guide and notes for contributors . . . it’s becoming fairly obvious that we need to get ourselves more organised, have a few rules about posting, be more explicit what we expect from writers and editors. So, next time somebody asks the question I began with I’ll know what to tell them.
Or write it in five hundred words or less.